Emma and I were watching an animated movie.
Me: “Awwww, is this the part where they fall in love?”
Emma: “What? Fall in love? The only thing they have in common is bumping in to one another.”
***
At the supper table one evening, we were discussing our upcoming anniversary of the day we met.
Me: “All this time and I haven’t tried to kill you yet.”
Ron: “Except for that time with the frying pan…”
Me: “Look, how many times do I have to tell you? I was NOT trying to kill you. I was only trying to hurt you.”
Ron: “You broke a cast iron frying pan.”
Me: “Because it hit the floor not you. I changed my trajectory at the last minute.” Pause. “You’re never gonna let me forget that, are you?”
***
Ron, pulling out wires: “Oh no they didn’t..” Pulls more… “OH YES THEY DID.”
***
After getting groceries:
Meaghan: “Mom, you have to try these grapes, they are so good.”
Sarah: “Yeah, they’re crunchy!”
Me, skeptical: “Crunchy grapes? Did they get frozen on the way home?”
Sarha: “Just try it.”
Meaghan: “Yeah, you gotta try it.”
I warily pop a grape in my mouth and crunch down on it. My eyes roll back in my head. Sarah hits the ground laughing. All I can say is, “Mmmmm… ohmigawd…. nom nom nom…”
Meaghan: “Told ya they were good.”
I threw a curling brush when I was mad once. It kind of backfired, though, since it was mine and I had to go buy a new one.
I threw a cell phone once. It was mine too. Dumb move.